Free views, you say? Don’t mind if I diddly-do.

Usually I give you Australian music but I’m going to go with the branch of my family history that’s more genetic than acquired.

Perhaps more requested than this article were my thoughts on the banlist before it was released, and my responses to all of you who asked me were essentially universal:

  • Heal events won’t come off
  • Puyo would not be hit
  • I am not in the business of making any other predictions

I think I’ve made it fairly clear when I’ve interacted with the community on various platforms that I opt against making predictions in the vast majority of cases without a significant amount of information, and it should come as no surprise that this is the reason why I have yet to make a bad call once the facts have been made available. Now that the facts are available, I am certainly not averse to making predictions.

My prediction is, therefore, that this banlist is as useless as tits on a nun. Read More


To Love Goon – How to be Green and Gold

As of writing, Y/G To Love Ru is one of the best decks in the game. It’s surely the second best deck to take into Swiss and it’s in at least the top 3 best decks to play in top cut. The existence of this deck – specifically the main 3/2, Yami – redefines the barrier of entry for every other set released before and after it. If you rock up to a serious tournament playing any deck that isn’t this deck, or one of the decks which can seriously challenge it, then you may as well take your lunch break instead of your fourth round. I personally ran this exclusively for tournaments before PY was released, because it is a very low-variance, high-reward deck that essentially allows you to chessmaster your way to wins. The deck has a lot of room for mistakes which leads some (incorrect) people to believe that it’s an ‘easy’ deck to play. This is true to an extent in that there are very few examples of complex sequencing in the deck and you can get along fine without having to think ahead a turn or two (compare to PY or NK, which at times have resource or card choice considerations to make). Furthermore, the finisher is the most self-sufficient in the game, which we’ll go into further in just a moment.

So grab your cask of Fruity Lexia and your sippy cup, cos you’re sure as fuck going to need it. Read More

Puyo Puyo more like Puyeahnahmate just shut up and listen ay?


I’d like to express my disappointment that Blue isn’t shortened to U in Weiss, because then this deck would be called Ryu Puyo Puyo and I would be free to invoke as many Shoryuken and Hadouken memes as possible.

Now I realise that for all the non-Australians out there (which is like 80% of my viewership, so I’m really hitting on a niche market here) a lot of this article may not make sense to you. If you’re European, substitute “goon” for “1984” or whatever shit beer the kids drink nowadays. If you’re American, substitute “goon” for “Bud Light but imagine if it was wine and it wasn’t shit”.

If you’re Asian, fuck, I dunno. Substitute “goon” for “that half sip of rice vodka I had at my grandad’s place that made me pass out”. Open question, can you guys actually maintain any sort of sobriety when consuming non-rice based liquor, or do you just pass the fuck out as soon as a whiff of liquid amber hits the back of your throats? Read More


I will give you a wall, I said.

And here is your wall. Walls take a lot of time to build, especially if you have to write a bloody long case analysis on Aboriginal land rights for Uni which is roughly long as this entire article you guys wanna hear about native title I’ll tell you about native title and here’s two hundred references about-


This essay is not short, and the introduction is certainly not concise, as I will attempt to pre-emptively address the majority of possible criticisms and alternate perspectives. This is so that discussion can be limited specifically to analysis and interpretation, and not devolve into attacks on the premise or legitimacy of the article (write your own article if the latter two are your issue). In fact, I look forward to the inevitable discussion and I’m sure we would all appreciate it if it stays relatively within the realms of questions along the lines of “What about this idea?” or “I think a better interpretation is X” rather than “Numbers don’t matter because there’s millions of situations”.

The analysis will, however, be as concise as possible.

You may use the search function for the items in square brackets to immediately jump to the relevant sections.  Read More


*sighs heavily in Australian*

Now that we’ve all had almost a day to calm down, let’s have a look at banlists and the state of the game. I’ll warn you now, there won’t be any pictures, just several thousand words of prose for you to look through. If that’s not your thing, you can jump down to the bottom or something.

I’m not going to list any of the stats or resources or whatever that are included here, they’re publicly available and you can go find them. Bushiroad’s banlist statement and accompanying graphs can be found, I promise. I don’t need a C&D on day 2 of this blog’s life.

In regards to the banlist itself, it’s the same, plus Purple Puyo in Standard. This is not insignificant to some people, apparently.

I have heard some speculation that banning out Purple Puyo in Standard could be interpreted as Bushiroad continuing to push the divide between Neo- and Standard, or perhaps basing the banlist on Standard and then porting it over to Neo-Standard. Both of these potential scenarios would be largely disappointing to me if they turned out to be true; I can’t remember the last time I played in a Standard tournament and I still have my Akinaris and Kirches sitting nicely in their sleeves. Setting up a Neo-Standard banlist based on the effects of cards on the Standard format is obviously archaic considering how little focus Standard is given. It is also unreasonable to assume that Bushiroad is taking this approach because they’re seeking to return Standard to the limelight; there are simply far too many sets out there right now, and it would be as accessible to your average player as no-proxy Legacy. I’d like to give the guys at Bushiroad the benefit of the doubt and grant that they are not actually basing this banlist on such outdated ideas. Read More


I, for one, welcome our TLR Overlords.

Given that Bushi hasn’t made a good banlist since the good old days of years before Neo Standard ie when there was no banlist (which is what, at least 6 years now?) it’s pretty unsurprising that they messed up this one as well. That is, however, an issue that we’re not going to address until later this week because it’s currently 11pm in down under land and I might run out of ping before this post uploads. Spooky. Also, I might get sued for my reactions to the banlist, shout out to silly copyright attempts and bad business America.

So why’s this blog here?.rhetoricalquestion.jpg

In all honesty, this blog would have started up about 6 months ago, except for the fact that a bunch of other blogs also randomly started up at the same time and I wasn’t about to be lost in the miasma of crazy into which some of them devolved. In any case, this blog was delayed and was planned to start up around the beginning of March. Bushiroad, being the wise and knowledgeable conglomerate that it is, decided instead to provide me with an opportunity on Facebook to vacuum up those likes; that is, their really poor banlist decision.

In capitalising on that brief moment of fame, thus begins the blog a month or so earlier than expected. Read More